Chinese Calculator

I swear that not all Chinese people know kung fu or how to use the abacus. It's a big stereotype. But I admit that one summer I did take an abacus lesson.

(Read about the abacus lesson here.)

Fashion Friday: You're Late For A Very Important Date

In the belated spirit of Halloween and Fashion Friday, the White Rabbit and my dad at Disneyworld, Orlando

Infinite Pumpkins

I only have things in multiples so here's what I have for Halloween. Infinite pumpkins!

The second to the left Jack is a plush basketball wearing a Jack-O-Lantern mask. That's his Halloween costume. 

The pumpkins adorn the living room. 

I wish it were always Halloween. From inheriting so much clothing, I feel as if I should wear an elaborate costume everyday. It's a strange thing to have infinite wardrobe options even when you aren't infinitely rich. Frilly victorian or Meryl Streep in Out Of Africa? Masculine feminine Annie Hall or Pretty In Pink? Maybe it's because I have spent too much time around clothes, but I am at a point where I have minor anxiety over not being able to wear all the things my mother left me. Even after giving away truckloads, there aren't enough days or nights or tea parties or horse races or weddings or gay clubs to wear what's left. I need to travel to the planet where it's Halloween everyday. 

Stories About The Things We Wear

Check out the story of the Sex Plug on a new project called Worn Stories! Each week WS features the story of a favorite worn item. Contributors include designers, writers, and artists such as the 8-bit Cory Arcangel. Emily Spivak, the creator of WS also edits Sentimental Value where she collects hilariously true stories found within eBay listings.

Music Monday: The Student Sound Volume 4

Crumpled with a moist layer of grime on the plastic sleeve protector, this record is from my grandfather's collection, shipped from Taiwan. It might have been my mother's. She's the most likely of her siblings not just to buy music but to keep it all these years.

I thought it was another luscious lady of Chinese pop, but the cover girl is the only thing Chinese about The Student Sound, Volume 4. The record is a compilation of western "golden hits" from '69, including "The White Room" and "Ob-La-Di-Ob-La-Da". 

When I think of "students" and "1969", I don't imagine a proper pin-up girl next to a flower. I think of girls with flowers in their hair, youth revolt, Third World Strike, and bell bottoms. The spirit of '69 got lost on the way to Taiwan.

Fashion Friday: The Jean Jacket

In a jean jacket and spiral perm, my aunt looks away. The conversation between my great uncle and grandmother doesn't interest her anymore.

The Bible On Cassette

We have many copies of the Bible in our house. Most are stamped with the addresses of the churches my mother took them from. She believed in blessing each room with one, open to her favorite passages. She was secretly hoping that with so many open bibles, I'd have to look down and start reading. Then I'd succumb to their holy power. When she was sick, I drove her to church every Sunday and would mouth the words to the songs, just to fit in. While I refused to get baptized, she was glad that I was under God's roof for a short time.

For a while she believed that blasting Christian radio sermons through the house would make it holy. I found it impossible to tune out the monologues about armageddon. It was a kind of sound torture, my mother must have known. We came to a truce. She then only listened to Chinese talk radio. I'm thankful that she never blasted the Bible on cassette tape and only littered the house with the books. 

The Survival Kit

Clockwise from the upper left: yarn rope made from a homemade loom (popsicle sticks glued on a toilet paper roll), Hello Kitty whistle, Hello Kitty origami paper, Sergio Valente zipper wallet, The Little Red Hen book with lenticular cover, Hello Kitty wind-up clip, Hello Kitty stamp, mushroom sticker dispenser, Goropikadon band-aids, Sanrio Vaudeville Duo band-aids, plastic letter stencil, glitter puffy paint, Hello Kitty gumball hair band.

When I'd come home for the holidays, I found it reassuring that I still had all my Hello Kitty crap and the Little Twin Star suitcase. It seems wrong that no one had made me get rid of these things and that as thirty something I could still "play" with them. As a kid, I put only the most important things in there. In the event I had to pick up and go, I'd have band-aids (two sets), reading material (The Little Red Hen), and something to sit on (yarn circular pad). 

I had never experienced natural disaster or political upheaval, but growing up Californian the earthquake preparedness drills at school must have really left an impression on me. Why else was I always assembling emergency kits? I made one for a wicker basket that had playing cards, marbles, vials of glitter, and Wrigley's Spearmint chewing gum. The glitter would be purely for aesthetic value and the cards entertainment. But gum was going to save my life! In the event I was stranded in a trench caused by an earthquake, I'd use the foil gum wrapper to signal passing planes for help.